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Sunday, June 17, 2012

To Save A Life

This movie is a great movie that has a wonderful message.  Rather than doing a synopsis myself, I will link to the Wikipedia page about the movie (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/To_save_a_life) so you can read that yourself.  I will *BRIEFLY* summarize the themes, just to give some background for the rest of this post.

The movie is about a high school senior (Jake, played by Randy Wayne) whose former best friend (Roger) kills himself right in front of him.  This sends Jake on a search for meaning that ultimately saves many other lives and brings him to church.   It is about the meaning of life, how to treat others, and overcoming obstacles.  (Hows that for brief!)

This movie really touched me because I could really relate to several of the characters.  Up until college, I was bullied, picked on, excluded from things, and somewhat friendless.  Granted, some of this was my own doing, but in school not much of it was.  Like Roger, I had a friend in middle school who turned his back on me in high school because I wasn't cool enough.  Trying to survive high school can be hard enough, but when you are more or less alone, it is even harder.  So, if you are reading this and are in high school, think before you act or speak.  I know that is almost a truism at this point, but it is really true.  Like Jake, I have been searching for meaning in life, still am (like most people probably).  Things in life don't always make sense, and they can be hard to grasp.  Religion can help with that if you let it.  But, you have to accept that religion doesn't give you all the answers.  I really want to address these two points in some detail below.

First, bullying.  I know I didn't have it as bad as some other people do.  I wasn't beaten up every day, but I was picked on a lot.  In fact, one parent told my mom something to the effect of the fact that I deserved it in order to be toughened up.  When you are picked on or bullied a lot, it makes it very hard to trust people or to form solid friendships.  After all, when you spend your whole school life learning that people don't like you or that they'll pick on you, why form friendships at all?  And that is the real tragedy.  Humans are social animals, we need to form relationships to remain whole and grounded.  Having even one solid friend can make all of the difference.  Having that one person to talk with, confide in, and share problems with can give you a sense of belonging that makes it less likely that you'll do something drastic.  Ok, generally.  If you pick the wrong friend, they can exacerbate the situation, but that is outside the scope of what I am dealing with here.  So take the time to get to know people and try and welcome differences.  We all give great lip service to respecting differences, but do we act on those words?  And don't just befriend someone just to do it, do it to get to know them, to care about them, and to let them know that they are loved by someone.

Second, religion.  Religion and religious people get a lot of bad press, some of it deservedly so, some of it not so much.  There is a line in the movie that people don't like to go to church because it's boring, full of hypocrites, and judgmental.  Unfortunately, to an extent, that is true.  But, separate the religion from the practitioners of that religion.  All religions are made up of people and people are imperfect and flawed.  The movie had a character who went to church and youth group, but still smoked pot, manipulated people, and did things to get others in trouble.  Not a good example.  Unfortunately, these are the people who tend to stick out in the minds of the public.  The public doesn't tend to think of the people who are doing what is right, helping others, and showing true love and charity.  That is what Christianity is about.  Now, sometimes this true love and charity does require some judging, but the judging needs to be charitable, not judgmental.  When someone is being told they are doing something they should not be doing, it should be in a loving manner, not a manner that tells them that they are not as good as others.  "Love the sinner, hate the sin" is the best summation of this you will find.  Also, religion requires faith.  Faith that things happen for a reason and that anything can be turned to good.  Faith that even when things are going to hell in a handbasket, God is there for you to love you and help you.  Is this easy?  No.  It never is, but it is crucial.  Faith manages.  Anyone can believe in the easy times, but in the hard times, only faith will see you through.  Another truism, but a solid one.

This movie is definitely one of my favorite movies.  It does not have a lot of action, the best acting, or even the most original plot, but its themes and the lessons it teaches are invaluable.